quoth the madman

"If identity is only a game, if it is only a procedure to have
relations, social and sexual-pleasure relationships that create new
friendships, it is useful. But if identity becomes the problem of sexual
existence, and if people think that they have to “uncover” their “own
identity,” and that their own identity has to become the law, the principle, the code of their existence; if the perennial question they ask is "Does this thing conform to my identity?“ then, I think, they will turn back to a kind of ethics very close to the old heterosexual virility. If we are asked to relate to the question of identity, it must be an identity to our unique selves. But the relationships we have to have with ourselves are not ones of identity, rather, they must be relationships of differentiation, of creation, of innovation."
▼Michel Foucault